List ten things you wish an adult told you when you were a child.
Choose someone you know well (or used to know) who is unconventional or eccentric, and tell the story of your relationship with this person and how he or she affected you.
Write a few paragraphs describing censorship. Include examples of how, when, and where censorship might occur. Is it ever okay to censor a book? Who has the right to censor a book? Is it ever okay for the government to censor its citizens?
I went with option 5: A person I knew well who was unconventional…
My friend Corrie (short for “Cornelia”, which she hated!), was born in Hengelo, a small Dutch town near the German border. A generation later, I came into being in Soest, Germany, only two hours away!
What are the odds we would meet on the other side of the world (Canada) twenty-two years after that and remain friends for life?
CORRIE & ME, CHRISTMAS 1992
Corrie and her first husband immigrated from Holland to Canada in the mid 1950s and subsequently had three children. He was a long-haul trucker, and she, a bar manager. After about 15 years, she discovered he was screwing around and dumped him. No fuss, no muss! That’s how she was.
My husband and I met Corrie in 1977, when she got together with our friend Tony. Is there something similar to ‘love at first sight’ for friendship? We clicked immediately and became an inseparable foursome!
“Wild, wild west!” Novelty photo, taken on our 10th wedding anniversary, Niagara Falls, 1983.
Corrie was determined to buy a house. She quit her bar job and starting working on the assembly line at the Ford Motor Company, our area’s biggest employer. This was a huge deal for 1977, as she was one of the first women hired to work in the plant.
On the assembly line, 1977. Photo courtesy of Corrie’s family archives.
The job was heavy, dirty and required shift work, but Corrie not only kept up with the men, she outperformed many! She was such an inspiration, management put her in a TV commercial. It aired on Saturday nights during the Hockey Night in Canada broadcast, watched by millions.
I admired her stamina, her strength of character and her no-nonsense attitude, as well as her gregarious nature. We embraced the “work hard, play hard” philosophy wholeheartedly for years and Corrie was up for anything. How dull our lives would have been without Tony and Corrie by our sides!
One of many New Year’s Eve celebrations, late 1980s
After 12 years of co-habitation, Tony and Corrie got married on July 1, 1989. They were moving his elderly mother in from Italy and Tony insisted, for mama’s sake. Corrie resisted at first, but caved eventually, uttering these words: “If this piece of paper changes anything, I WILL KILL YOU!” 😆 “Once bitten, twice shy”, as they say!
Both ceremony and reception were held in their large backyard, complete with tents and live music, provided by our friend Rob, a hairdresser-cum-lounge singer. Everyone had a blast!
Tony and Corrie’s backyard wedding, with hubby as Best Man and me as Matron of Honour.
The honeymoon took place a year later, in Italy, where the four of us celebrated their first anniversary and hubby’s 40th birthday.
In 1996, Tony was diagnosed with liver disease and waited three long years for a transplant. Other health problems developed, and he fought valiantly to stay alive, losing his battle on Aug. 12, 2009. You can read more about that here: (Right-click to open in a new tab.)
Corrie kept a diary of those harrowing years, which she would not show to anyone, saying it was too gruesome. I was in awe of her bravery.
Life was never the same, of course. Corrie became a recluse, not wanting to be a “third wheel” on our outings, and spending more time with her grandkids and great-grandkids. They loved their “Oma” dearly, and she spoiled them royally.
The last time we convinced her to come out with us was on Dec. 31, 2019, to celebrate New Year’s Eve at our favourite restaurant. Corrie was her old “life of the party” self and the staff loved her! We were happy to see her in such a good mood, but also worried. She was having trouble walking…
COVID descended on the world in March 2020, and shortly thereafter, Corrie slipped and broke her wrist. In a double blow, she was diagnosed with stage 4 colon cancer and breast cancer simultaneously! We were all shocked, but my brave friend handled it with her usual aplomb. “Every day is a good day” became her motto, and she refused all treatment.
Thanks to the pandemic, I could not visit her as frequently as I wanted to, especially in the beginning, when lockdowns were tight. As time wore on, the rules relaxed, but apart from the germaphobia (I didn’t want to infect her with anything), I had an increasingly hard time watching her waste away and made excuses, something I regret to this day! 😔 We chatted frequently by phone though, and always ended the conversations with “Love you!” (me), “Love you more!” (Corrie).
Corrie’s 86th birthday was on June 4, 2021, and I made a special album for her, with scanned photos of the good old days. She was touched, and we both cried. That was the last time I saw her in person.
Photo album cover.
On July 15th, Corrie’s daughter texted me that Corrie had been rushed to the hospital and wouldn’t be coming out. A few hours later, she was at my door, delivering a treasured keepsake her mother wanted me to have. Corrie died the following day. I stored the object in my basement and couldn’t even look at it for three years. 😭 Finally, this summer, enough time has passed, and I gave it a place of honour on our back deck.
Corrie’s treble clef ornament hung on her living room wall for 30 years. Now it’s an homage to a unique and vivacious friend, whose presence is sorely missed.Love you, Corrie!
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Dog Mom and (retired) Canine Innkeeper in suburban Toronto, Canada, known as The Doglady. Former corporate workaholic. Writer, photographer, digital creator. Animal lover, music fanatic, inveterate traveller. Eternal hippie/rockchick. History, literature and cinema buff. Hockey and soccer fan. Dedicated night owl. German/Canadian binational, multilingual. Let me entertain you!
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15 thoughts on “💞💞 MEMORIES OF A DEAR FRIEND 💞💞 | #WritersWorkshop 👩💻”
Well, what I was going to try to say must not have been good, because my first keystroke was a wrong one and took the whole page down… so I’ll just say, “Every day is a good day…” and hope I can keep on saying it.
What a nice tribute to your friend Corrie; this is beautiful Debbie. I like how your friendship began and evolved and you have many nice memories of the two of you, four of you, then sadly, just the three of you. She was quite a woman and kudos for being the first woman on the Ford assembly line. How sad that the first husband was such a disappointment, then she found love, only to have it snuffed out earlier than it should have – sigh. Why is life like that sometimes? And if the “ex”, then the loss of Tony were not already bad blows, then her health issues and painful death … why do some people have it all and not in a good way? Thank you for sharing your friendship with Corrie with us.
What a loss for you, Debbie, and it was twice over. You lost Corrie when her husband died, and you lost her again when she died. I know you feel bad about not going to see her more often, but contact with other people was dangerous for her. Although she refused treatment, she was better off not getting a cold, COVID, flu, anything, that someone might have accidentally given her.
So sorry for the loss of your dear friend. You’ve created a loving tribute to your friendship through the laughter and tears and she will never be forgotten. <3
Sitting here, reading and re-reading this, totally choked-up. Such a mixture of wonderful, of fun, of sad. Mostly, demonstrative of a loving friendship.
Corrie was blessed to have you in here life as you were in hers. Thank you for sharing such loving memories, Debbie.
I’m so sorry, Debbie. Corrie sounds like she was such an incredible person and a source of joy and comfort, and your friendship with her is just beautiful to read about. I love the idea of “love at first sight” for friends! Thank you for sharing her and your story.
Wow! I think who’ve we’ve known in life is the best part of life. And I so agree with the sentiment of every day being special. I feel it more every day.
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15 thoughts on “💞💞 MEMORIES OF A DEAR FRIEND 💞💞 | #WritersWorkshop 👩💻”
Well, what I was going to try to say must not have been good, because my first keystroke was a wrong one and took the whole page down… so I’ll just say, “Every day is a good day…” and hope I can keep on saying it.
What a nice tribute to your friend Corrie; this is beautiful Debbie. I like how your friendship began and evolved and you have many nice memories of the two of you, four of you, then sadly, just the three of you. She was quite a woman and kudos for being the first woman on the Ford assembly line. How sad that the first husband was such a disappointment, then she found love, only to have it snuffed out earlier than it should have – sigh. Why is life like that sometimes? And if the “ex”, then the loss of Tony were not already bad blows, then her health issues and painful death … why do some people have it all and not in a good way? Thank you for sharing your friendship with Corrie with us.
What a loss for you, Debbie, and it was twice over. You lost Corrie when her husband died, and you lost her again when she died. I know you feel bad about not going to see her more often, but contact with other people was dangerous for her. Although she refused treatment, she was better off not getting a cold, COVID, flu, anything, that someone might have accidentally given her.
Love,
Janie
What a wonderful friend to you she was, and you were a wonderful friend to her. She lives on with you in your heart.
So sorry for the loss of your dear friend. You’ve created a loving tribute to your friendship through the laughter and tears and she will never be forgotten. <3
Sitting here, reading and re-reading this, totally choked-up. Such a mixture of wonderful, of fun, of sad. Mostly, demonstrative of a loving friendship.
Corrie was blessed to have you in here life as you were in hers. Thank you for sharing such loving memories, Debbie.
I’m so sorry, Debbie. Corrie sounds like she was such an incredible person and a source of joy and comfort, and your friendship with her is just beautiful to read about. I love the idea of “love at first sight” for friends! Thank you for sharing her and your story.
What a beautiful tribute to a wonderful friend. My commiseration for your loss.
Debbie I am very sorry for your loss. You described a beautiful friendhip and you wrote a beautiful tribute.
Thank you, Thomas! 🙂 Friendships like that are rare and I still miss her terribly.
💔
Wow! I think who’ve we’ve known in life is the best part of life. And I so agree with the sentiment of every day being special. I feel it more every day.
Lee
Thanks, Lee! 🙂 The older we get, the more each day seems precious.
A beautiful tribute. Friendships like yours with Corrie are what we all hope for.
Thank you, Becky! 🙂 Such friendships are rare and I still miss her terribly.