There’s a dead maple tree right in the middle of our otherwise lovely backyard.
Not being arborists, we didn’t heed the signs and now it’s too late.  


dead tree in the middle of the yard

 It’s such a sad sight and no amount of hanging plants can make it look cheerier.
That tree has to go!  I wrote a little “Ditzy Ditty” about it, to cheer myself up:


Sung to the tune of
“Dead Skunk in the Middle of the Road”
©Louden Wainwright III

Here’s the original to give you the melody:

♫ Sing it with me♫


Standing so tall for many years
The nicest one among its peers
The handsomest one of all by far
The tree just died and there you are

You got your dead tree in the middle of the yard
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Looking so sad and naked


We should have paid attention more
And called for help the year before
But on the other hand you see
It would have died eventually

You got your dead tree in the middle of the yard
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Looking so sad and naked


dead tree with landscaping

Yeah we got our dead tree and our landscaping too
We’re thinking here about what to do
Can we leave the trunk at least for awhile  
And keep the plants that make me smile?

You got your dead tree in the middle
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Looking so sad and naked
C’mon look


You got it, it’s dead, it’s in the middle
Dead tree in the middle
Dead tree in the middle of the yard
Looking so sad and naked
All over the yard
Brown as mud


Oh, we got troubles          
It’s dead, it’s in the middle
And it’s looking so sad, sad and lonely


©D.D.B. 2014 (except as noted)

Have you ever had to deal with removal of a dead tree?  Do you have any advice?  We would prefer to leave the landscaping as is for the moment (new project for next year), using the tree trunk as an ersatz plant stand, but sawing off the dead branches.

Looking forward to your comments!


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Debbie D.

Canine Innkeeper in suburban Toronto, Canada, known as “The Doglady”. Writer/website owner, animal lover, music fanatic, inveterate traveller. History, literature and cinema buff. Eternal “hippie/rockchick”. Binational, German/Canadian and multilingual. Currently working on various memoirs, travelogues and creative writing pieces. Looking for the next adventure!

Debbie D.

Debbie D.


Filed under Ditzy Ditties, Humour, Life


  1. That tree is so stunning, You mention in the comments that it might have died due to a fungal infection. How long would the soil be contaminated for. I’ve heard of trees and roots dying. However, I just don’t know how long the death is a detriment to the area around the dead tree.

  2. I didn’t realize that having a dead tree in the middle of your yard was a big deal. We have been deciding wither or not to cut down our tree for sometime now. It has been looking rather dry and dead anyway. Because of the way it looks we are most likely going to cut it down.

  3. Cathy

    You’re so good at these parodies on songs,aren’t you? Another fun one!
    Cathy recently posted…Golden Days of SummerMy Profile

  4. I think you should use this dead tree for lighting at night. You can use lead lights around the tree they will give more attraction to your house.

    ~Diana Hardy
    Dr. Diana recently posted…Creative Spring CleaningMy Profile

  5. Jess

    Haha love your little ditty! Wish you all the best with your removal of the dead tree…ahh, doesn’t seem like the easiest thing to get rid of!
    Jess recently posted…New Yorker Moments: One YearMy Profile

  6. Kajal

    This one is tricy for sure. Sometimes one has to let go, no matter what. I have never had to witness a cutting of a tree but it feels sad that smething that had stood the test of time has to leave. Hugs to you, Debbie!
    Kajal recently posted…InnocenceMy Profile

  7. Awww!! It looks sad! Esp in Spring/summer when everything is in bloom!
    I liked the song as well.. hearing it for the first time! 🙂

  8. Hi Debbie! That’s sad but this tree is still complementing the landscape. I think leaving the tree trunk intact is a great idea! Liked the song 🙂
    Shilpa Garg recently posted…BoomerangMy Profile

  9. Oh that’s a real shame. Soft or hard maple?? I can’t imagine what killed it; those are one of the most dependable in Michigan (hard & soft) and here (soft). It didn’t look that mature; don’t tell me there’s yet another kind of beetle infestation brewing 🙁

    Loved your ditty to buck yourself up and your hanging plants. Leave it for autumn and you can hang scarecrows and witches and goblins 🙂
    Sammy d recently posted…Wonderful Team Member Readership AwardMy Profile

    • Hi Sammy; I know, we’re really bummed out about it! 🙁 It was only about 20 years old too. My tree knowledge is limited, so I’m not sure what type of Maple it was, but I think it was Maple Wilt that killed it. At least, that’s what I figured from reading symptoms online. (Click on the link in my post (the signs), if you’re looking for more info on the subject.) Love your Halloween decoration idea! 🙂 Thanks for visiting and have a good weekend.
      Debbie recently posted…SOLITUDE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  10. Cute parody. About the only thing I can suggest it cut off some of the dead branches so that they don’t become a danger and since you plan on waiting until next year for this expensive project (and it is expensive), plan on keeping a very close eye on it because it will probably be sooner than later that you’ll have to spend the money to take out the tree.
    G.B. Miller recently posted…White NoiseMy Profile

    • Hi George; Glad you liked my little ditty. 🙂 Yes, we are planning to remove the dead branches; don’t want them falling on the house behind us. I’m hoping we can leave the rest until next year though, because we’ll also have to change the landscaping. Thanks for visiting and have a good weekend.
      Debbie recently posted…SOLITUDE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  11. Hi Debbie,

    We have a dead tree in our yard too. The dogs like to run around it play so we’re leaving it there for now.

    Enjoyed the song too :). Hope you’re having a great week! Are you ready for the weekend?
    Corina Ramos recently posted…Work-from-Home Job Spotlight: APAC Customer ServicesMy Profile

    • Hi Corina; We’re going to leave the trunk and continue to use it as a plant hanger for now. 🙂 Removing the whole thing and re-doing the landscaping will be fairly expensive, so we’ll save that project for next year. Always ready for the weekend, but that’s usually a busier time for me. Nice to have hubby home though. Thanks for visiting.
      Debbie recently posted…SOLITUDE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  12. So sorry — that is awful. I hate seeing that happen. We had a dogwood tree that wasn’t dead but had to come down as they carry water and become too heavy. Three men came with their come-alongs and equipment and had it all lined up to fall away from the house. Our son was in his crib sound asleep for his afternoon nap. As the tree started to come down, I watched it shift. These trees are extremely dangerous because of the water weight. It fell within inches of my son’s bedroom (the exact opposite of where it was supposed to) – it was so heavy that it bounced 3 times when it fell, took out the dog house and the shed. The water shot up in the air about 20 feet and the smell was horrendous. It sounded like an earthquake.

    So, I am sure your experience will be a piece of cake, right? Let me know 🙂
    Carol Graham recently posted…Sure-fire Way To Handle DiscouragementMy Profile

    • We’re pretty unhappy about it too, Carol, but a little humour goes a long way. For now, we’re just going to remove the dead branches and leave the trunk, because we don’t want to re-do the landscaping, etc. That will be next year’s project. It can enjoy a new purpose as a plant hanger.
      What a nasty experience you had with the dogwood tree! 🙁 I didn’t know they could be so troublesome. Guess we won’t be getting any of those. Thanks for dropping by.
      Debbie recently posted…SUNLIGHT – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  13. Hey Debbie,

    sorry to hear about your tree. It doesn’t look too big. I’ve removed a few trees from my yard and have one sitting there right now that a storm tore in two. I basically cut it down so just the trunk is left. I then dig a big hole round the trunk chopping all the roots as I come to them. The ones that are really troublesome are the ones that go straight down.

    I then rock her back and forth every now and again to loosen things up a bit. Eventually I am able to pull it out. It’s not easy. Actually it’s back breaking work Sometimes it takes me several days. But hey, its free exercise right?

    Love the poem. I have several on Wassupblog and one on YouTube.
    Peter recently posted…NFL Cheerleaders Hot Sports Babes #4My Profile

    • Hi Peter; It was about 20 years old and not that big. We do plan on cutting off the dead branches and leaving the trunk in place, for now. We did that with another dead tree many years ago and it eventually just died naturally. Makes a cool plant stand. 😉 Glad you enjoyed the song lyrics. Funnier when you sing them. I’ll check yours out as well. Cheers!
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  14. I am sooooooooooo sad for that tree. Poor baby. Will you plant another one there?

    btw, I love that TALK TO ME thingy above! SO COOL…but I do not have a microphone, so I can’t talk to you.
    My Inner Chick recently posted…I Was Blind, But Now I SeeMy Profile

    • We are sad too, and losing the privacy it provided is a major bummer. 🙁 For now, the dead branches will be removed, but we’re leaving the trunk in place, because we don’t want to deal with re-doing the landscape. That will be next year’s project. 🙂 I would like to plant a row of Cedar trees all along the fence in future, to block out the neighbour’s house.
      Yes, that voice mail thing is pretty cool. If you have a laptop, there should be a mic built in. Thanks for dropping by!
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  15. Mike

    This is a good diddy, Debbie! I’m so sorry for your tree that undoubtedly was proud and full of life once upon a time! I have some tall cylindrical evergreens (sorry, I’m not a tree/bush-ologist) in the backyard and two of them have mysteriously died. I’m baffled and it bums me out because they are a buffer to the neighbors. I don’t understand how after 25 years two of them go kaput and the rest in the line are fine. I’ve been contemplating having someone come check it out. Almost like the two of them were poisoned or something. Anyhoo…this post REALLY hit home today. Thank you 🙂
    Mike recently posted…Stuffed Mushrooms On A Brisk Winter NightMy Profile

    • Hi Mike; This tree was about 20 years old and we’re sad about losing it. 🙁 Also bummed out because we too have lost a good bit of privacy now. Sorry about your evergreens – they sound like Cedar trees and are commonly used as privacy buffers. Hopefully, it’s not some disease that will spread to the others. Getting them checked out might be a good idea. Wish we’d thought to do that earlier, but we just assumed it would be okay, despite the sparser growth last year. Thanks for dropping by! 🙂
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  16. I felt like crying when I read those lyrics. We’ve had some trees cut down in our yard and it was so painful. Some of them were chopped off keeping the trunks and these are now sprouting fresh green leaves. Still, we mourn the ones that had to go from the root up.

    That bare tree looks beautiful to me. Hugs Debbie! Hate it when things we love have to go!
    Vidya Sury recently posted…Why Writers Block Is Afraid Of MeMy Profile

    • Hi Vidya; Yes, it’s a sad situation, so I’m trying to diffuse it with a little humour. 🙂 For now, we will cut away the dead branches and leave the trunk. So expensive to remove the whole thing and re-do the landscaping! I tried to beautify it a little with the hanging plants. Looks a little less naked, at least. Thanks for dropping by.
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  17. So sad. I hate when trees die. I cried when one of my trees died. It was huge and gorgeous and it made me cry to lose it (and it also made me cry because it cost $900 to have it cut down and removed! It was a really HUGE tree!). So I really feel for you, Debbie. But you can plant another one in it’s place and get something that it a fast grower, you’ll be back to a lush tree in your yard within 2 seasons. Great idea on the song! That’s funny. 🙂
    Michele Truhlik recently posted…Do Animals Play for Sheer Delight or Is There More to It?My Profile

    • Hi Michele; We weren’t at all happy, but I’m trying to deal with it using humour. 🙂 I know how expensive it is to remove trees, as well as re-do landscaping, so for now, we just want to cut off the dead branches and leave the trunk. I believe it is a fungal infection, so planting something else there may be asking for the same fate? We’ll revisit the subject next year. Eventually, I think a row of Cedars along the fence would be a good idea, since we’ve definitely lost some of our privacy now. Glad you enjoyed the song, anyway. Thanks for visiting!
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

  18. Bravo! Like the song… Dead Tree…
    The tree actually looks pretty good.

  19. sorry about your tree. We have a dogwood in our front yard that seems to have breathed its last, but I don’t want to have it removed because its the only tree we have there and I hate bare front yards. a new one would take so long to grow. don’t know what to do yet

  20. Hi Debbie,

    Those were lovely lines indeed 🙂

    Yes, we used to have a dead tree in our backyard too but never had the heart to remove it for the good memories associated with it, the time when it flowered and gave us fruits. We also used to climb it as it was at my grandparents place. We just let it be and it died it’s natural death with time.

    Thanks for sharing. Have a nice week, whatever’s left of it 🙂
    Harleena Singh recently posted…What Is Your Most Prized Possession in LifeMy Profile

    • That’s sad too, Harleena. We just want to remove the dead branches, for fear they may fall and damage the house behind us. The trunk can stay and die a natural death, I think. Changing the landscaping around the tree would cost a fair bit and we’d rather defer that for some time. Thanks for dropping by and enjoy your week as well.
      Debbie recently posted…BLACK and WHITE – PHOTO FRIDAYMy Profile

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